I Want To Speak

But i am without words or passion for such activities at this juncture. i wish you all the success in the world. its funny how the world works.... im sorry....

my head is a jumbled mess right now, so many ideas whizzing around my cranium and dangerous speeds and organization of such thought is damn near impossible.

it seems as im not the only one with problems, as i have read many things that are surprising and upsetting at the same time. i wish i could take all the negative energy and destroy it and erase it from the minds a hearts of all whom it plagues.

i want to live in that utopia... or perhaps i dont? such an idealistic thought.

hmm.... would boredom set in without any conflict, even in the slightest? and then after, the resolve of such horror. im not sure, for i have never experienced such of lived a life of peace entirely.

i wonder what the future holds for me
for my friends
for my family
for my love

no one can know, and no one can tell.

does it truly matter in the long run? most likely, i would say not.

i am emptying my head for the evening before i engage in listening to some ace tunes and then head into a slight slumber for the hours i have left until my blaring alarm clock resets me for another day.

my head is still full, till the brim, but never spilling, not as often as i would hope at any rate.

save me?
someone?
anyone?

this is all babel

good evening ladies and germs



always trying to figure it out,

<3

I Am Far Too Disturbed...

... To write upon this matter now, prehaps at another time and place. i am upset... quite so...

how can people be this way?

...

looking for the answers,

<3

My Encounter With Winston

Yesterday, while trying to uncover the driveway from its icy prison and create a better path to enter the driveway from, i was greated by an older woman and her two dogs. she said hello and i replied hello with a joyful tone, as i try to have when i am speaking to someone of aquaintence. her young pug, winston, came up to me and rubbed up against my leg and i petted him and shortly there after he hopped up on my leg and wanted me to pet him again, he had clearly taken a liking to me and he was a cute little fellow if i do say so myself. the woman and herr dogs then left to go on with their business after a short and kind farewell.

instances such as the afformentioned encounter are plesent reminders of why i love animals and as to why i have chosen to be a vegitarian for what is going on four years now.

animals are innocent
animals are kind
animals are loving
animals are intelegent
animals are better than human beings

at least at this current juncture and most likely for the remainder of my time her on this planet

humans are such a dissapointment to me for many unsetling reasons and i feels as if we have all lost so many opportunities for what could be a wonderful exsistance for all living creatures. instead selfishness rules our thoughts and oour actions are dictated by such. it is a disgusting sight and one to say that i have unfortunitly been tried and convicted guilty of.

we can all be better people, we can all improve and create peace and anarchy for all.

we just need to try.

thats all for now, as i have to rest and relax before a hard day of work bright and early tomorrow before the super bowl.

my prediction: steelers when, but im rooting for the packers, only because steelers fans are quite obnixious.
haha... love ya!

....im quite done now.
sports are over hype and ballet.


finally on the road to true happines,

<3

The Great Melting

everything is melting
turned into its truest form
does this mean hope?
i think so
a positive and optimistic outlook are upon me
i see the light
i see my future
there is no other
for i have seen the other side and it is horrid and full of liars and skanks
ive found love
and with my teeth sunk in deep
i will never let go

waiting for the inevitable perfect moment,

<3

A Beast

Breathing
snorting
vile creatures
we have all become
we are all filth
no!
lower than filth
we are nothing...

more on this matter soon

gasping for the truth,

<3

One Word Makes The Difference

Love, mystical in all its ways and worries, can make or break a man, destroy his spirit or create a mental utopia for the victim. i have been fourunate enough to feel both. a man of many fates. some of the feminane spirits in my life has created such an atmophere as for me to flourish and grow as mere human being. a love unheard of in most cirlces. and others in the same such fashion have create a personal, firey hell for my soul and heart to rot in and decay from the maggots among my flesh. one such soul has done both and shall never be truly forgiven, and will in all rights, but punnished for such actions of betrayal and atempts to pull the wool over thine eyes to the larger cause in witch i was unknowingly partisipating in.

others though, and one in all actuallity have done the exact oppisite of such actions in my life and maturing. weather deserving or not, she was always there for me when i needed it most and put up with my bullshit for reasons unbeknownst to me. love, i suppose, it the cullprate for this devotion.

recently, most notably yesterday, certain actions have lead to the belief in certain thoughts. love. love. love...

was it a slip of the tounge?
a mistake in lauguage?
a deeper look in the subconcious desires of the beautiful?
i am unsure, but willing to believe the best, for my case at least

things all point to a grand future and to lovers.

i am off to play apples to apples for now
the game of champions.

haha...


disguised in plain view,

<3